The Worlds of Kaomaris

The leaders of the big beer companies meet for a drink. The president of Budweiser orders a Bud, the CEO of Miller gets a Miller, the head of Coors gets a Coors, and so on. Until it's Arthur Guiness's turn. He orders a soda.

"Why didn't you order a Guiness?" everyone asks.
"Nah," Guiness replies "if you guys aren't having beer, then neither will I."

C'mon Nick, we gotta cut Coors some slack, they do brew Killians after all.

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true, then be selfish and worry about my liver.
-------Jack Handy

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. ---Henny Youngman

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning that's as good as they're going to feel all day.