Where did all my great jokes go?

Everything non-WOK related should go in here.

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Lardmaster
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Where did all my great jokes go?

Post by Lardmaster » Thu May 24, 2007 10:17 pm

The jokes thread seems to have gone a bit weird. Try clicking on page 7. There was more stuff in their before Vortans post on page 6. There was my great snowman mass grave joke for starters.
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Saladin
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Post by Saladin » Fri May 25, 2007 7:24 am

Tell it again Lardy! Tell it again!
"Never attribute to malice what can satisfactorily be explained away by stupidity."

"To speak ill of others is a dishonest way of praising ourselves."

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Post by Lardmaster » Fri May 25, 2007 12:44 pm

Just for you Sal.............

When I was younger I used to be in the police. In my first week I discovered a mass grave of murdered snowmen.

Turns out it was just a field of carrots :P
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Post by Saladin » Fri May 25, 2007 1:23 pm

Ugh...are you sure you're not a woman Lardy?

I read today that women seem to prefer German humour and men seem to prefer British humour.

That sure looks like some German humour to me. :roll:
"Never attribute to malice what can satisfactorily be explained away by stupidity."

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Post by Lardmaster » Sat May 26, 2007 10:55 am

Last time I checked..........

Actually I stole that off a British stand up comedian so I think perhaps you maybe need to check your self out Sal :lol:
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Post by Saladin » Sat May 26, 2007 2:45 pm

Maybe it's just your delivery that's not up to the British standards. :D
"Never attribute to malice what can satisfactorily be explained away by stupidity."

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Post by Lardmaster » Sat May 26, 2007 6:47 pm

Hmmm, it's just written so there is no delivery. Must be your own reading delivery. Have a few beers and try it again :lol:
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Post by korexus » Sat May 26, 2007 9:01 pm

Sal: You may not know this, but when Lardmaster was younger he worked as a policeman. (Lardmaster work? I hear you cry but apparently so.)

Anyway, it was hard work, walking the beat, learning how hard you can hit people with a trunceon without leaving a mark, not to mention the disciplinary hearings after he turned his sirens on so he could get back to the station before the fish and chips got cold. But there was one really big event, in his very first week he discovered a mass grave!

Seriously, it appeared that somone, some evil person - maybe scarred in childhood because they'd never been taken 'walking in the air' had actually rounded up a whole load of snowmen into a field and then murdered every single one of them! Imagine young Lardmaster's excitement and nerves as he filled in the report!
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Post by korexus » Sat May 26, 2007 9:03 pm

It turned out to be a field of carrots.


(English humour tends to work on distracting you and blabbing on so you laugh with relief when the punchline finally lumbers over the horizon. This is seen as easier than making the punchline actually funny...)


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Post by Saladin » Sat May 26, 2007 9:12 pm

Very good Korexus! Didn't i see you perform at the Apollo last year? :)

Lardy, i think that might be it...see i don't drink alcohol so maybe i'm less entuned to get the joke. :wink:
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Post by Lardmaster » Sat May 26, 2007 11:22 pm

You........don't..........drink............alcohol

:eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2: :eek2:

:angel:

I'm sorry but that's just not fair. I never do my orders sober so you have an unfair advantage. I think you should have to use a Chinese keybaord to do yours.

And nice one Kor :P
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